I tend to make it a point to surround myself with people that are sincere and real within their own skin. I think that everyone should focus on surrounding themselves by people who are supportive and genuinely care about their personal well being. I don’t believe in letting people into my personal space that only seek to take and not give back. I call those people vampires. I may do a blog about that at a later time so I won’t digress here.
Well over time I have worked to surround myself with people who fill me up with positivity just as much as I seek to do the same for them. Now in doing this, I tend to be really slow to let new people into my life fully. It typically takes a while before I allow someone to be close to me, especially intimately. I am a fiercely loyal person, a truly Taurean trait. When I decide that someone can be close to me, I will always have their back. Sometimes my mom says that I can be loyal to a fault and I suppose there is some truth to that.
As I have gotten older and more in tune to my own personal intuition, I am even more fiercely loyal, especially when I am drawn to someone in spite of myself (sometimes). If something tells me that this person is worth the extra effort, I have no problem putting it forth.
Right now I have someone in my life that I believe is worth the effort but in spite of all of my sincere efforts, I can’t seem to properly convey that loyalty to this person. I have been a fierce supporter and loyal friend to this person but he constantly questions me at every step. I have never asked him for anything but his ability to allow himself to trust me. Now, I realize that trust comes in time, which is why I am understanding about his desire to question me at times. However, I am starting to grow weary of trying to show him that he can trust me and trust in me. I’m beginning to wonder if it will ever come to pass.
I like to believe that patience is an important virtue in life and I know that in strength lies the ability to be patient but sometimes I worry about this situation. Sometimes I get so frustrated with trying to do what my heart tells me that I wonder if it will ever end. I am waiting to see if something will tell me to walk away but it hasn’t in spite of his apparent inability to see my sincerity.
I guess since I made it a point to listen more closely to my inner voice, I will continue to do what I’ve been doing and wait to see how things will ultimately turn out.